Anemone
by Wulfkub
Summary: Willow does go evil and, man, has the story taken over. Chapter 13 finally up - sorry this took so long, pc died. Please R&R and tell me whether to keep or rewrite or put in the trashcan!
1. Prologue

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no i have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible  
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.  
  
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"What have you done?"   
  
The horror on Buffy's face as Willow turned to look as her best friend struck Willow to the bone. For one brief second, Buffy could see the flash of the old Willow before the agony and the rage took over again. Willow turned her back on Buffy, refocusing on Warren; throwing herself into hatred and evil, the same way that she used to throw herself into the good and the happiness. Buffy was rooted to the floor as she watched Willow tear Warren apart, as she allowed her best friend to murder another human.  
  
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Buffy woke up with a shudder, quelling the scream that was rising in her throat. *How many times do I have to dream that same dream? How many times do I have to loose my best friend?* Sitting up in her bed, she dragged her hands through her hair before getting out of bed to pace the floor. Not surprisingly, when she went downstairs, she found Xander awake still. He had given his apartment to Anya and moved into Willow's old room in the Summer's house after Willow left them.  
  
"Couldn't sleep either?" Xander said as he saw her coming down the stairs.  
  
Buffy looked at him, saw how tired he was, "Xander, go to sleep."  
  
He looked at her, wooden features, "I can't sleep. Everytime I close my eyes, I have that dream again." He looked down at his hands before saying softly, "I miss her."  
  
Buffy smiled slightly and said "Me too," knowing that neither she nor Xander could have said which of the three women they missed more. 


	2. Setting Up

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no i have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible  
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
They sat on the roof of a building, silently sharing a bottle of something or other between the two of them. Cast in the shadows, one could tell that one of them was female and one was male but that was about it. The shadows hid the rest and neither of them were speaking. Of course, at this point, the two of them no longer needed words to communicate. Not since they had united with a common goal in mind and had found other things along the way. They watched and they waited, looking for all the world like a pair of gargoyles hanging over the town.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"So that is the last $25 that I owe you, Anya." Dawn said as she handed Anya a twenty and a five. "Thanks for not hauling me into jail for, you know, shoplifting and stuff. And thanks for letting me work here to get the money to pay everyone back."  
  
Anya turned to take the money from Dawn, "It's ok, Dawn." She smiled, a tired smile but the first real one that anyone had seen since her disaster of a wedding. "I am happy that you decided to work off your debt, it has been a lot of fun having you here in the Magic Shop with me."  
  
"Yeah." Dawn said, remembering all the hours she worked over the summer just to avoid being in the house with Xander and Buffy, neither of whom were particularly thrilled with the idea of Dawn working for Anya. It was not that they didn't trust Anya to watch out for Dawn, it was the emotional residue between the three of them made for awkwardness if not downright meanness. It was almost like having Spike around to snipe at Xander but of course Spike was gone too. Dawn mentally sheid away from that thought, the only time that she allowed herself to think of Spike was when she wrapped up in his duster and went to sleep. Neither Buffy nor Xander knew that Spike had left his duster, nor did they know that Dawn had it. They would have taken it away from her if they knew. "So like, now that school is starting back up, can I still work here part time?"  
  
Anya smiled again, "Of course you can work here after school and on the weekends. But don't neglect your homework, I don't want Buffy breathing down my neck."  
  
"No, no of course not." Dawn said hastily, "Course Willow won't be here to help me with my computer courses and Tara with english and stuff." Both women looked saddened at the mention of the two names, the pain was less now and they could talk about it some but it still hurt.  
  
"I can help you with your history, you know." Anya said brightly as she put up a couple of books, "I was there for most of what you will be studying. I can also help you with your math assignments so I think you're covered."  
  
Seeing the tenson in Anya's face, Dawn reached over and squeezed Anya's hand, "He misses you, you know. And he still does love you."  
  
Anya looked at Dawn, one tear slowly rolling down her cheek, "But he doesn't love me enough." She said simply.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Hi guys, how was work?" Dawn asked Xander and Buffy as she walked into the house into the kitchen. "I officially paid back my entire debt to society today but Anya said I could cut back to part time and still work at the Magic Shop, if it doesn't interfere with homework and stuff."  
  
Xander's head snapped up at the mention of Anya's name, longing and hunger starkly apparent in his eyes before he covered the emotions up under a boyish mask. Both Buffy and Dawn pretended not to see the look in his eyes as he said, "That's great, Dawn. So, now, what was the lesson that we learned from this particular adventure."  
  
Dawn rolled her eyes and played along, "Don't steal because you will always get caught sooner or later. But, you know, I actually feel really good for finally paying all the merchants back and I am really sorry, you guys. I just wanted, you know, some attention and stuff." As their faces both fell, Dawn smiled and continued hastily, "But it's ok now, really. I mean like I learned a valuable lesson that I will never forget and we are more like a family now, you know? So it's all good."   
  
"Well, we try." Buffy said, sharing an almost parental look of pride with Xander. The two of them, with Anya's help, were raising Dawn and turning her into a real human being. "I don't have a problem with you working through the school year if you want to Dawn. Just remember that working will curtail your extracurricular activities and that you are so not allowed to spend all of the money that you make."  
  
"Actually," Dawn said, looking down at the floor, "I want to give the money to you two. To, well you know, to help out with the bills and stuff. I mean, I know that I don't make a lot of money but every little bit helps, right?"  
  
Both Buffy and Xander looked floored by Dawn's generous offer. Finding his voice first, Xander said, "Dawn, honey, you don' t have to do that. Buffy and I have it covered."  
  
Buffy spoke as well, "Dawn, Xander is right, he and I do have this covered."  
  
"But I want to help." Dawn insisted, furiously willing her tears out of her eyes. *Here they go, treating me like a kid again.* "I mean, it doesn't seem fair, I don't get to help with Slaying or researching and now you won't let me help with the bills. I just want to help, ok?"  
  
Buffy, seeing the tears well up in her sister's eyes, softened immediatly. "Dawn, you shouldn't have to help us pay for stuff. I mean, you are still in high school and you don't even need to have a job. But since you do want one, neither Xander nor I are going to stop you. I have to insist that you spend your money on yourself, you have like your whole life ahead of you to worry about paying bills. Why would you want to take on that kind of responsibility at your age when you don't have to?"  
  
Dawn smiled at Buffy and threw Buffy's words back in her face gently, "Buffy, I have to."   
  
Buffy stiffened as she heard and remembered the splintering of the universe around them, high on that lonely tower, blood streaming down Dawn's arms. She remembered the wind whipping through her hair, remembered how she was no longer afraid any more, remembered what she told Dawn before leaping. Snapping herself back to the present, Buffy smiled tenderly at Dawn and said, "Yes, I guess you do." She turned to get something out of the fridge and said, "Ok but half of the money you will save, a quarter for rent, and a quarter to blow. Sound cool?"  
  
"Cool." 


	3. Enter the Players

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no i have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible  
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The motorcycle roared to a stop in the road, kicking up dust. The rider on the back of the bike slid off and walked over to the sign, leather boots kicking up even more dust. "Sunnydale." The woman said, stretching her body, luxuriating in the feel of the leather on her skin, slanting a "come hither" look at her partner.  
  
The other rider slide off the bike and came over to her, running his fingers over her exposed flesh, one hand around her waist, one hand trailing down her back, folding into a fist, and grinding into her lower back. She arched under his hands, moaning slightly as he made contact with some of the sorer spots. He lowered her head to her neck when she tilted her head out of the way in silent invitation. Instead of sinking his teeth into her flesh, something they both longed for, he merely licked the bite marks he had left on her neck. When she moaned again, this time in frustration, and tried to pull him closer, he said "No, pet. Later tonight, I may. If you are a good girl."   
  
"But I am always a good girl." She pouted, playfully arching into his body so that he could feel her curves. It was his turn to moan as she rubbed up and down enticingly. "That is, I am a good girl until you tell me it's playtime. Is it playtime yet?"  
  
"Soon, pet." He murmered into her hair, eyes slanted in extasy. "Soon it will be playtime for us."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Buffy hung her coat on the coat rack and walked into the living room. Seeing Xander dozing on the coach, she smiled at her friend. In truth, her best friend and the last of the "scoobies" that still hung around on a regular basis. Tara was dead, Willow and Spike were god only knows where, Giles was in England, Angel and Cordelia were in LA, and Anya was most reluctant to come to the house. Of course, Buffy and Anya's relationship was extremly strained due to the night in the Magic Box on the geeks' candid camera. Sighing, she sat down next to Xander.  
  
Xander shuddered once and then opened his eyes, still blinded by the dream that he had. "Buffy." He moaned quietly, voice full of pain.  
  
Buffy knew that it was time to wake him up, this was the part of the dream that always was bad for him. He told her of it once; of hearing Warren call Buffy's name, seeing her turn around, hearing the shots fired, watching his best friend collapse on the ground, hearing Willow scream for Tara, blood everywhere. Buffy, of course, was kind of hazy on the details herself, knowing only what those that were there were able to tell her. Gently, she took Xander's hand and squeezed it, "I'm here, Xander. It's okay, we are okay, just open your eyes for me. It's only a dream, just shake it off."  
  
The cloudiness lifted from his eyes and Xander woke fully. With a gasp, he pulled Buffy into a rough hug, clinging to her even as his body shook. "Gods, Buffy. That dream..."  
  
"Shush, it's okay, Xander." Buffy said, allowing him to hug her, running her fingers through his hair, kneading the muscles in his neck. "I am here for you. I will always be here for you."  
  
Xander relaxed under her tender ministrations. There was nothing at all sexual in the contact between the two of them, their relationship had mellowed more in the past couple of months until they were the absolute best of friends, more akin to siblings than anything else. He tried to smile at her, to put on the boyish facade that he so badly wanted to be able to hide behind, hiding behind humor instead, "Anything to get your hands on me."  
  
Buffy smiled at him and lightly cuffed him on the head, "Would you stop that?" She said, less than serious. "Where is Dawn?"  
  
"She went to bed about an hour ago. I checked on her before I came down and she was sleeping. Then I came down and was watching some tv when I fell asleep." He moved his neck and grimaced slightly, "Well, if you can call this sleeping. I call it 'weird body contortions' myself."  
  
"Well, you do have a bed, you know." Buffy chided gently. "If you actually slept in your bed instead of the couch once in a while, you may be able to get some more sleep."  
  
He smiled at her, a smile full of tears and loneliness, "Yeah but the bed is so empty. And sometimes, when the nightmare comes to me, it's just easier to doze in front of the tv. That way, when I wake up, I can immediatly loose myself into someone else's problems. And if I don't like their issues, I can always turn the channel." A ghost of the old Xander reared it's head, "You know, life ought to be more like tv."  
  
"Huh?" Buffy said, totally lost but willing to find out, just to keep him on the safer emotional footing.  
  
"You know," he grinned, "Totally hot babes everywhere you go, the power to change with the touch of a button, rewind, pause, and fast forward. What more could you ask for?"  
  
"How about a mute button?" Buffy smiled as she said it, remembering when she and Riley fought the Hush demon things. "On second thought, scratch the mute button. I so do not want to repeat that. Do you want someting to drink?" When Xander demured, she went to the kitchen and poured a glass of water. Coming back in the room, she sat back down on the couch and asked, "Totally hot babes? What am I, chopped liver?"  
  
"No." Xander said, reaching over to squeeze her hand, "You are my sister in everyway that matters except blood. You are closer to me than my own family, my own blood. And, yes, you are totally beautiful so stop fishing for compliments from me." The two of them laughed and curled up on the couch together, content for the moment.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The phone woke Anya up. Puzzled, she picked it up and said, "Hello?"  
  
"Anya? Hey, I am so sorry that I woke you up."   
  
Anya sat up upon hearing the voice on the other end of the phone. "Oz, where the hell have you been? I have been trying to get a hold of you for a month now."  
  
Oz sighed on the other end of the line, "I know and I am sorry about that too."  
  
"Never mind all that, what did you find out?"  
  
Oz spoke, failure eating him alive, "I can't find her. It's almost like she died. I tracked her down into some god forsaken country and then I lost her. The weirdness comes in; the night I lost her, the wolf attempted to take me over again. That is the first time in years that it has done so."  
  
"Oh." Was all that Anya could say, dread filling her. "Thanks for looking, Oz. If you do find her, let us know, ok?"  
  
"Yeah." Oz breathed, worry deadly apparent in his voice, "Yeah, I'll do that." 


	4. Warnings

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.   
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no i have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible   
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer   
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Buffy walked through the graveyard, stake in one hand, on the lookout for vamps or demons or just something to kill. She was waiting for something to rise, something to attack her, something to let her burn off some steam. Eventually she sat down on a headstone and remarked to herself, "You know, there is something so deeply wrong about people who hang out in graveyards looking for a fight."  
  
"You looking for a fight slayer?" A voice growled behind her, "Well we can oblige you."  
  
Buffy whipped around to see two vampires behind her. These two were obviously not newly risen and they looked to have been working together for a long time. She smiled and raised her stake, "Bring it on."  
  
The three of them closed for the fight, Buffy throwing the first punch, knocking the smaller one back. The larger vamp growled low in his throat and open palmed stuck her on her chest, knocking her back into the tombstone that she was just sitting on. When she rolled off it to get to her feet, a small part of her mind noted the crack that ran through the stone. "Can you guys have some respect for the fellow dead?" She taunted, trying not to show how much her lower back hurt. "I mean, it's always 'let's go to the graveyard for a fight.'" Don't you think the dead would rather we take this elsewhere?"  
  
The two of them growled and rushed her. Trading blows, it seemed that neither Buffy nor the two vamps could get a killing shot. Jumping up in the air, the smaller one managed to kick her, knocking her back into the same tombstone which shattered when she hit it. Gamly trying to hide how much that hurt, Buffy pushed herself to her feet, wincing in agony, "Look at what you did. You are gonna have to pay for that."  
  
"Put it on my tab." He growled back, readying himself for the fight. Again the three of them closed, the vamps could tell that Buffy was hurt and they smelled her blood, coppery and sweet, in the air. It was driving them crazy, wanting to taste the Slayer's blood. Buffy, on the other hand, was starting to weaken and her back was on fire. In a surprise move, the bigger vamp did a spinning leaping kick and knocked Buffy down to the ground. The smaller one grabbed her hands and the taller one her feet, effectively pinning her to the ground. "Look what I got." He taunted. "I think I will just have a little taste."   
  
Buffy watched in horror as the vamp leaned down, game face on. *Oh my God, I am so going to die* she thought, bucking her body wildly in an attempt to dislodge the two vampires. They both tightened their grips til she could no longer move and she quelled the scream rising as the vampire nuzzled her neck, much like Spike used to do. The vamp grinned and allowed one of his teeth to graze her neck, making a small cut that he licked. "Slayer, you taste so good." He growled in her ear. *Why didn't he bite me* she wondered as he pulled his head back. "I bet you are wondering why you are still alive. Well, there is a friend coming to town and we are the messenger. Prepare yourself, Slayer, the end of your world is coming soon." He rubbed his hand over the cut on her neck, smearing the blood over his fingers before fastidiously cleaning her neck with his tongue. The two vampires leapt off her and disappeared into the night.  
  
Buffy laid there for a full minute. The rain started and she just laid there, shivering at the close call she just had. Finally, she dragged herself to her feet and started the walk home.  
  
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"Did you deliever the message?" The man asked from the shadows on the old warehouse. It wasn't the safest place in the world to be, she knew where it was after all, but they were moving soon.  
  
"Yes, I told her exactly what you told me." The smaller vampire answered. The man stepped out of the shadows for the first time. The two other vampires almost leapt back in surprise, not having seen Spike in forever and certainly not on the side of evil. "Spike," the smaller one stammered, "We thought you were dust man."  
  
Spike sniffed the air, "Yeah, well, I'm not dead yet. And I'm not dust either." That smell in the air was so familiar, he could almost taste it. "You tasted the Slayer." He said, voice flat with accusation, face morphing in fury.  
  
The fury coming off Spike was enough to make both vamps take a step back, "Just a taste, Spike."  
  
"I trust you didn't kill her." He glared at the two vampires as they shook their heads, "Good. Now you made her aware of her vulnerability. Now I can step in and drive her insane."  
  
"Don't you me 'we,' Spike?" Willow asked, pouting, as she came down the stairs, completely encased in skin tight leather again. "You did promise that I could taste the Slayer as well, especially if I was a good girl."  
  
The two other vampires gaped at Willow, the larger one finding his voice first, "But you, you are one of the Scoobies."  
  
Willow's face morphed into game face and she punched the vampire that spoke, "Don't ever call me that." She snarled, reaching for a stake to finish him with. Seeing that Willow was going to kill the vampire, Spike caught her arm a split second before she would have finished the other vampire. She looked at him mutineously and snarled, "Spike, let go of my arm."  
  
"Come on pet," he said, using his free hand to caress her neck, "Let him go, love."  
  
She twisted against him, eyes turning black with magic, "Spike, let me go. Now."  
  
Taking his other hand, Spike gripped both of Willow's arms and whipped her around. Pulling her against his body, he murmered into her ear, "He didn't know love. If he does it again, you can kill him." Lowering his head, he kissed her hard enough to draw blood from her mouth, hands digging into her arms. Willow slid her hands up his shirt and raked her nails down his back, growling low in her throat. Spike laughed and picked her up, slinging her over one shoulder before turning to the other two, "You two might want to leave while I have her under control." Turning, he ran up the stairs and slammed the door. 


	5. Assemblage

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.   
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no i have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible   
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer   
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Oh my God, Buffy what the hell happened to you?" Xander asked, worry apparent in his voice.  
  
Buffy closed the door behind her, leaned against it and said, "I lost...it was just a fight, Xander. Nothing to worry about."  
  
"Nothing to worry about?" Xander growled, taking in her disheveled appeareance, the cut on her neck, the blood, mud and water on her clothes. "You come home, looking like something the cat dragged in and there is nothing to worry about?"  
  
Buffy pushed herself off the door and said, "I am going to take a shower and change clothes. We can talk about this when I get back."  
  
Rising to follow her, Xander continued the argument, "Buffy, you lost a fight. You never loose fights. What the hell is that?" he said, finally noticing the blood staining the back of her shirt. "Your back is covered in blood."  
  
Twisting around to look, Buffy hissed in pain and would have fallen down the stairs if Xander had not steadied her. "Damn." She hissed as the pain set in, "That was when they kicked me into the gravestone. I didn't think I was bleeding back there." She sighed and said, "Xander, I need you to take off this shirt, I don't think I am going to be able to." She swayed against him, obviously fighting for balance. Xander gently pulled her shirt loose of the congealing blood and lifted it over her arms, catching her when she fell.  
  
"You are in no shape to do anything." Xander stated flatly.  
  
"I have to take a shower."  
  
Letting loose an explosive sigh, Xander said, "Fine. But I am going to be in there with you to make sure you don't pass out and hit your head. Don't worry, I won't look."  
  
"Whatever you want, Xander." Buffy said tiredly, coming to the end of her tether. She walked into the bathroom and turned on the water. Xander stayed outside until he heard her get into the tub. Coming in the room, he avoided glancing at the shower and sat down on the edge of the sink. "So there were two of them." Buffy said as she allowed the water to cascade over her body, "One short and one tall. They kicked me into a gravestone twice, I guess that is when I hurt my back. Then they both tackled me, delivered a message and left."  
  
Xander rubbed his eyes tiredly, "That so does not explain why you have a cut on your neck."  
  
"When they tackled me, the smaller one didn't bite me. I don't know why he didn't bite but he grazed my neck with his teeth. Then he licked at the blood." Buffy shuddered at the memory and at the pain from the soap hitting the cuts, "Then he said something or other, ending with 'Prepare yourself, Slayer, the end of your world is coming soon.'"  
  
Xander clenched his hands, "You let him bleed you?"  
  
"It wasn't like I had much choice in the matter." Buffy snapped back.  
  
"The end of your world?" He asked, "Are you sure that was what he said."  
  
Buffy started to wash her hair, "Yeah. Usually they said 'the end of the world blah blah blah' but this one definatly said that the end of MY world was coming. I wonder why he said that." Her wounds were starting to heal, the pain was growing less. "Why is it that messengers deliver these really crappy messages? Just once, I want a message that says something like 'we will be at the docks at 11 o'clock. We are going to end the world by killing you and opening the Hellmouth. Bring a date.'" She smiled into the water, "But no, it's always 'be wary for we are coming' and 'the end of the world.' Like, where the hell are the details."  
  
"I guess they should have used FedEx." Xander quiped and smiled.  
  
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Dawn and Anya were at the Magic Box, closing the shop for the day. "So like Buffy and Xander don't have an issue with me working here over the school year. That is like so cool, don't you think?" Dawn asked Anya.  
  
Anya smiled again and said, "Yes. More fun with you and me running the store and making money." The doorbell chimed as someone walked through the door, "I am sorry but we are closed." Anya said as she turned around to see Oz standing in the doorway. "Oz, oh my God, what are you doing here!"  
  
Walking over to Anya, Oz pulled her into a quick hug. "I caught the red eye from London. I'm all screwed up now, what time is it? Hey, Dawn."  
  
Dawn waved a rather listless wave and said, "Hey Oz, it's like 11 I think." She wondered at his presence here, she knew that he and Willow used to date and stuff but was kind of hazy on the details.  
  
Oz smiled tenderly at Dawn, he knew more of her through Willow's letters and Anya's phone calls than she knew of him. "Right, thanks Dawn." Giving Anya a meaningful glance, he asked, "Does she know?"  
  
"Ah, right. No. None of them do." Anya said quickly.   
  
"Know what?" Dawn asked.  
  
"Well it's like this," Oz started to say. At the look from Anya, he shrugged and said, "She has a right to know. Anyways, Anya told me what happened with Willow and Warren and how Will disapeared. So I volunteered to track her down. I followed her to London, then to the Middle East. I lost her in an African jungle and haven't seen her since then. Like I told Anya on the phone last night, right after I lost her, the wolf attempted to take me over again, something it hasn't done in years." He turned his head away and muttered to himself. "She always could do that to me."  
  
"So like why are you here?" Dawn asked, attempting to keep the antagonism out of her voice.  
  
Oz turned to look at her, unable to conceal the haunted look in his eyes. "Well last night, after I got off the phone with Anya, I had a vision. The wolf brought it to me and told me to get my rear to Sunnydale as soon as possible. Having lived on the Hellmouth as long as I did, I know better than to ignore visions so I got a plane ticket and hauled ass over here."  
  
"Ok." Anya said, gamely ignoring the pain in her heart, "Let's close up shop and go to the Summer's house."  
  
Dawn and Oz looked at her in surprise, "Are you sure?" Dawn asked.  
  
Swallowing back her tears, Anya said, "Yes."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Spike and Willow were upstairs. As Spike was rubbing his hands up her leg, she stopped him with hers and looked right through him. "He is here." She murmered before drawing Spike to her for a fierce and passionate kiss.   
  
Spike broke off the kiss and moved down, kissing her neck, kneading her breasts, before sliding down. When she thrashed and screamed her orgasm, he slid back up the bed and took her roughly. "I will make you forget, love." He growled, "There will be no one left in your head but me." Moving his hips, he pinned her arms above her head. "You are mine and mine alone. Branded by my bite." Lowering his head, he tightened his grip on her arms, leaving bruises in his wake.   
  
Willow arched under him, trying to draw him closer. "Yes, Spike." She panted, "I am yours. I am your good little girl."  
  
He stopped and looked at her, "Are you?" A dangerous glint shown in his eyes. Lowering his head to her neck, he said, "Then you will cum when I bite you, when I hurt you, when I want you to."  
  
"Yes, Spike, please." She screamed as he bit down on her neck, fangs sinking into the scars he had left when he turned her. Her nails raked his back as she convulsed around him, drawing blood from him. He shuddered once, twice, and released her arms, curling up around her possesively. "I love you, Spike."  
  
"I love you, Red." Was Spike's reply. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"  
  
"You did, love." Willow replied, stretching luxuriously on the satin sheets.  
  
Scowling, he looked down at his hands, "Are you ok?"  
  
Playfully, she trailed her hand over the scratch marks on his back before bearing down on one and reopening the skin. Licking the blood off her fingertips, she whispered, "Everytime we have this conversation, the end is always the same. I always tell you to bite me again, Sire." With a growl, Spike rolled her over and started back up again. 


	6. Explanations

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I am just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemnly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.   
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no, I have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible   
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer   
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Xander and Buffy went downstairs after the shower and the bandages had been applied. "Dawn is on her way home, isn't she?" Buffy asked, tiredly rubbing her eyes with one hand, flipping on the TV with the other.  
  
"Yeah." Xander replied, "The Magic Box closed half an hour ago, Anya should be dropping her off any minute now."  
  
"Try right this very second." Dawn said as she opened the door. "Hey guys, you miss me?"  
  
Anya and Oz had entered the house right behind Dawn and were waiting for the others to notice them. The wait was not long. Simultaneously, Buffy cried out "Oz!" when Xander said, "Anya!"  
  
Jumping off the couch, Buffy pulled Oz into a hug and said, "My God, where have you been? We missed you so much." The two of them started a rapid-fire catch up session and he gave her the situation with Willow.  
  
The actions of Buffy allowed Xander to hide the pain in his eyes. It was too late to do anything about that pain filled cry but maybe Anya didn't notice how he was bleeding for her. He could not find his voice as he looked at her. Even after what he did to her, what she did to him, he still loved her madly. *If only she hadn't pushed me into this whole marriage thing so soon, we would be good. Neither of us would feel like this.*  
  
Anya, too, was looking at Xander, drinking in the first sight of him that she had had in weeks. He looked more tired, thinner, as if he was a piece of wire that had been stretched too thin, almost to the point of breaking. She found herself praying, for the first time in a very long time, and only for his sake, something she had never done. *Gods, just let him get through this please. He does not deserve this torment.* Very slowly, she walked over to his side and reached out for his hand. Giving it a gently squeeze, she released it and sat down on the couch, to listen to what Buffy was telling Oz.  
  
"So you don't know where she is?" Buffy asked gently, she could see how this was tearing Oz up.  
  
He rubbed his hand through his hair, "No. Her scent, her essence, is gone. But she's not dead. I would know it if she was dead."  
  
Quickly, Buffy clicked onto the conversation she had with the two vampires and filled Oz in on those details, "You know, I am having a thought." She paused for a second, trying to organize the information whirling around in her head. "What if he meant Willow is coming back here?" The group paused as a whole to think about what that would mean, what the warnings meant. "God, why do I have a feeling that this is going to majorly suck?"  
  
Dawn came over to her sister's side and put her arm around her waist. "We will deal with that when the time comes. Right now, you guys need to get some sleep before you all pass out."  
  
"Right. Sleep." Buffy said with a faraway expression in her eyes, "Oz, you want to crash on the couch?"  
  
He shrugged and said, "I'd be as content with a corner of the hardwood floor, I am that tired. I haven't had a chance to do much of anything since I got in, let alone check into a hotel."  
  
Buffy gave him a tender look, "Stay here with us, Oz. You know you are always welcome in my house."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Anya was getting her car keys when Xander's hand closed over hers. "Can I please talk to you?" He asked quietly, more serious than she had ever seen him. She agreed and followed him upstairs to what used to be Tara and Willow's bedroom. She sat down on the edge of the bed and he pulled up a chair. "Do you," he paused then changed what he was going to ask. "Do you want something to drink or something?"  
  
Lacking the resources, she merely nodded and waited for him to return with two sodas. He set them down on the table and sat down. "This is," he paused to take a drink, "This is not going to be easy for me, or for you." He said as he looked down at the floor. "Promise me that you will just bear with me and listen to what I have to say, without interruption, otherwise," he slanted a look at her, full of boyish charm, "I don't think I will have the courage to tell you what I need to tell you. Can you do that for me An?"  
  
Willing down the tears that were perilously close to the surface, she took a sip of her soda to hide her emotions, "I promise, Xander, but only if I get to talk when you are done."  
  
"Fair enough." He flashed a smile at her, "And I promise to listen to you. If you want to call me names and fling things at my head when I am done, please feel free." He stood up out of the chair and wandered over to the window, pushing aside the curtain to look out at the night, "If you are willing to listen to me, I will tell you things I have never told anyone before, not even Willow or Buffy." He said bleakly. "You saw what my parents were like at the wedding, you have seen and heard them in their house. You know what the demon told me at the wedding."  
  
He glanced up at Anya; she was surprised to see the fear and the agony etched into the lines on his face. Every part of her longed to go to him, to touch him, to wipe away the pain, but she refrained, knowing that this was not the right time for that. "My father," he swallowed hard and closed his eyes, the better to press on. "My father used to get drunk. Well, he still does. But he used to get drunk and hit my mother. So she started to drink too, you know, to dull the pain. They would fight about money and he would hit her, sometimes knocking her unconscious." He clenched his hands tight, as he remembered the pain, "The first memory I have of my parents is of them fighting. That is a terrible thing to remember, terrible to realize that you were only four years old."  
  
Spinning around, he slammed himself down in the chair, gripped the arms, and looked at Anya before looking at the floor. "It wasn't to much later before my father," he sneered the word, "started hitting me. I was only five years old and I was being beat with a belt, a switch, his fists, a beer bottle, whatever was handy. At first, it was only once a month or so, usually when I had done something bad. Then it got more and more frequent. Later I found out that my mother," this time he hissed the word, "would tell my father lies about stuff I supposedly did to avoid getting beat herself. This went on for years and years." Xander was crying now, tears slowly trickling down his cheeks to splash on the carpet, unnoticed. "Finally, one day, I had enough. The day before I snapped, Dad had beaten me to the point where I couldn't walk very well and had to miss school. So Dad hit me on the old bruises for missing school and I lost it. I knocked him into the fireplace and I picked up his gun. I hit him with it a couple of times. Blood was coming from all over the place, I was so numb, I didn't care anymore. I cocked the trigger, intending on ending his life, and was squeezing the trigger when my mom stopped me. She broke a lamp over my head. I guess dad beat me some more when he came to because I woke up three days later in the basement, feeling like a mac truck ran me over."  
  
He smiled gamely at Anya before continuing, "I tried to run away then but the state brought me back. Since there were no visible bruises and my parents called the school to tell them that I was going to be out of school for a few days, the state didn't care. My father never touched me again physically after that but mentally," Xander actually shuddered, "he became the master at torturing me without ever laying a finger on me." He paused, took a deep breath, and looked Anya straight in her eyes, "I don't EVER want to be like that. Ever. No child should have to suffer what I did. And I was afraid, I still am afraid, that I will end up like my father. My father loves my mother, loves her deeply, as much as I love you. But he treats her like shit, beats her, and puts her in the hospital occasionally. I don't want to be like that but I am afraid that I will become that. Anya, I ran away because I could see me doing it one day. You know, getting mad at you and hitting you. Part of me would hate myself for doing it but there is a sick sad little monster in me that would do the happy dance when I hurt you. I don't know if it's nature or nurture or if I am really twisted but part of me would feel like I was getting back at my father and mother for hitting me by hitting you. But I think I would kill you, An, with no one there to break a lamp over my head."  
  
Xander fell silent and stared at the floor, tears flowing freely down his face. Anya removed her hands from her mouth and looked at him for a long time, trying to absorb what he told her, trying to make sense of it all. Finally, unable to see him in pain without offering some comfort, she scooted over closer to him and took one of his hands in hers. She was shocked to see how cold they felt in hers and she cradled the hand in an attempt to warm it. "Xander." She started to say and fell silent for a moment. "Xander, you are not your father." The tears started to flow down her cheeks, "You are incapable of inflicting that kind of pain on the people that you love." When Xander opened his mouth to interrupt, she put one hand over his mouth, "Not now, it's my turn to talk."  
  
She rubbed her hands over his, trying to bring warmth back into them. "Yes, you hurt me when you left me at the altar. Yes, you have hurt me by not confiding this to me sooner although I understand why you did it. Why you did both of them. That does not mean that I love you any less or that I think you will turn into the depraved monster that your father was." She sighed and continued, "I love you...and I forgive you. You need to see a shrink but I still love you."  
  
He looked at her, shock and the tentative beginnings of hope lighting his eyes, "Do you mean that?"  
  
"Of course I do." She kissed him on the lips softly, "When you love someone as I love you, you can't just walk away. You can't pretend like the life that you shared didn't happen, as much as you may desperately want to deny its existence. I have spent years with you and I am not willing to throw that all away without a fight. But only if you promise me, you swear to me, that you will get help, you will see a shrink, and we will get married, someday, whenever you are comfortable with the idea."  
  
"It may take years." Xander said as Anya pulled him closer to her. "I can't promise that this healing will be quick, Anya, but I am willing to work through it if you are there to help me."  
  
Anya kissed him again, pulling him close to her body, "I love you. I will always be here for you, as long as you want me."  
  
"I want you." Xander moaned, "I love you so much. God please don't let me be stupid anymore."  
  
"God has nothing to do with it," Anya said, pulling him down onto the bed with her, "I do." 


	7. Flashbacks

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemnly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them. The lyrics in this chapter are "It's Been Awhile" by Staind off the Break the Cycle album and no copy write infringement is intended on the song  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no I have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible  
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.  
  
Let me just say that flashbacks are awesome, I love flashbacks.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Willow was in the bed; Spike was up smoking a cigarette. He was watching her sleep, something he used to do with Buffy and Dru. Never with Harmony though. Harmony, he shuddered as he remembered her, what a total mistake that was. Watching his love, the one who truly matched him, he saw the dreams overtake her yet again and he wondered what she dreamed, what went on in Red's mind when she slept.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
What have you done?  
  
Willow looked at Buffy, desperate and hurting. Not seeing salvation in her eyes, Willow turned back to Warren, knowing that she was now outcast forever. But it was ok. She was avenging Tara's death the only way she knew how, the only way that the Slayer taught her to, repaying blood with blood, death with death.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
As Willow dreamt, that stupid song, the one that reminded her of her humanity, of what she traded away, of what she was trying to run away from, played a soundtrack to the dream. Sometimes she thought the dream was going to drive her mad, crazier than even Drusilla was. Sometimes.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It's been awhile, since I could   
Hold my head high   
It's been awhile since I first saw you   
  
  
Willow dreamt of the first meeting between herself and Tara, how shy and uncertain the two of them were around each other.  
  
  
It's been a while since I could stand   
On my own two feet again   
It's been awhile since I could call you  
  
  
Always, why did this part always have to hurt like this? Reliving the fight they had, Tara leaving her, Tara meeting another girl.  
  
  
But everything I can't remember   
As fucked up as it all may seem   
The consequences that I've rendered   
I've stretched myself beyond my means  
  
  
Using the magic, pushing Tara away because she was unable to admit her addictions. Hurting Dawn in the car accident. Hurting Buffy by hurting Dawn. Hurting Xander by turning her back on him, not that he or Anya gave a damn all wrapped up in their wedding plans, something that she and Tara were denied. Fucking up spell after spell. Being caught fucking up spell after spell. Having the spell work but still getting caught.  
  
  
It's been awhile since I could say   
That I wasn't addicted   
It's been a while since I could say   
I love myself as well   
It's been awhile since I've gone and fucked things up   
Just like I always do   
  
  
Lying to them all; hurting them all. Craving the magic like she now craved blood, hot and wet spilling over her tongue, fierce and uncontrolled. Hating herself for hurting her friends, hating her friends for making her get clean, hating the magic as much as she loved it.  
  
  
But all that shit seems to disappear   
When I'm with you  
  
  
Spike, the only one that she never hurt directly. The only one that she could not hurt directly. The only one that she never ever felt guilty around, the only one who understood the addiction and the withdrawal. The only one who could cool the fire in her with the coolness of his skin for, even as a vampire, the witch blood still burned hot and heady within her.  
  
  
But everything I can't remember   
As fucked up as it all may seem   
The consequences that I've rendered   
I've gona and fucked things up again.   
  
  
Using the magic, pushing Tara away because she was unable to admit her addictions. Hurting Dawn in the car accident. Hurting Buffy by hurting Dawn. Hurting Xander by turning her back on him, not that he or Anya gave a damn all wrapped up in their wedding plans, something that she and Tara were denied. Fucking up spell after spell. Being caught fucking up spell after spell. Having the spell work but still getting caught.  
  
  
Why must I feel this way   
Just make this go away   
Just one more peaceful day   
  
  
Realizing that Oz was never coming back. Watching Tara die. Ripping Warren to shreds. Shaking as the magic coursed through her, as she allowed the channels to open, the addiction to take a hold. Turning to follow Spike, using her magic to track him across the globe, hunting him as he once hunted her.  
  
  
It's been awhile since I could   
Look at myself straight   
It's been awhile since I said I'm sorry   
It's been awhile since I've seen the way   
the candles light your face   
But I can still remember   
Just the way you taste   
  
  
Finding Spike in some African hellhole, not really even sure where they were. The chip was still in his head, she offered to remove it with magic if he would turn her. Feeling his fangs sink into her neck, her blood being drained, watching as he slit his wrist and let her drink his blood. Waking with a start, highly disoriented. Spike taking care of her so tenderly. The spell. Removing the chip.  
  
  
But everything I can't remember   
As fucked up as it all may seem to be   
I know it's me   
I cannot blame this on my father   
He did the best he could for me   
  
  
Spike holding her through the nightmares, through the fear. Telling Spike that she loved him, joyfully accepting his love in return. Spike taking her to bed. Spike showing her was love could be, the boundaries that she had never before dared to cross. Reminding her that love and pain were very often the same thing, just as love and hate were two sides of the same coin. Spike, always there, washing her mind clean of thoughts of Tara or Oz, the two that left her.  
  
  
It's been awhile since I could   
Hold my head up high   
And It's been awhile since I said I'm sorry...  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Snapping awake with a start, Willow looked at Spike leaning up against the wall, smoking another cigarette. Tenderly, she smiled at him and said, "You didn't leave me."  
  
"No pet." He said, roughly flinging the cigarette out the window before coming over to the bed. "I will never leave you."   
  
She reached up and pulled him down on the bed with her, hungrily kissing his mouth. Tearing her mouth away from his and rolling on top of him, she started to rip off his shirt, take off his clothes, driving him crazy with fangs and fingers, drawing blood with both. Just as she brought him to the climax, she stopped, "Tell me you love me." She ordered, eyes blackened with lust and power.  
  
"I love you." He growled and flipped her over onto her back. Entering her, he moved rhythmically, "I love you and I will never ever leave you, Red. Never." He licked her neck once, twice, before sinking his fangs into her skin, bringing both of them to a shattering orgasm. 


	8. Dawn

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemnly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no, I have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible  
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Morning dawned, bringing with it the rain. Xander woke up and reached over for Anya. She made a little sound in the back of her throat and cuddled closer. He propped himself up on one elbow and ran his fingers through her hair. "What did I ever do to deserve you?" He whispered, quietly so as not to wake her. He was still completely awed by her reaction to his revelations, he half expected her to turn from him in disgust or fry him on the spot but she didn't. Instead, Anya offered her love freely, giving him a second chance. A chance to make it right between them. The two of them had fallen asleep last night, fully clothed, still talking about what lay between them.  
  
Anya slowly woke to feel Xander's hand rubbing her hair. Arching against him, she smiled and said, "Good morning, Xander."  
  
"Morning, Anya." He said, his hands stilling when he realized that she was awake.  
  
Scooting him closer to her, she murmured, "Don't stop." He began to run his fingers through her hair some more, "Gods, how I have missed this. I have missed you." She raised her lips up for him to kiss them, which he obliged.  
  
A knock sounded on the door and Buffy called out, "Xander, get up. It's time to get ready for work." Turning the knob, she entered the room, pausing for a split second as she saw Anya, a smile breaking out over her face, "Morning Anya."  
  
With that smile, Buffy let both of them know that she approved and Anya smiled back, "Morning Buffy."  
  
Buffy quelled the rising yell of joy, "Dare I hope that the two of you are going to work things out?"  
  
Xander cleared his throat, "Well, we talked last night," he and Anya shared a secret lover's look, "and there is some stuff that I need to tell you, Buffy. Something that I should have told you a long time ago. Then I need to make an appointment with a psychologist to work through some of this stuff. I am going to need your help, Buffy, your's and Anya's."  
  
"You got it." Buffy promised, biting back the flow of happy tears that were trying to escape. "You know I love you both and I would do anything in my power to help you. I am glad that the two of you are going to attempt to work this out, you two have spent too much time and energy on each other to let this go, to let your love go, without a real fight."  
  
Anya stared at Buffy, hearing the echoes of what she told Xander last night in Buffy's words, "I am so happy that you said that." Glancing at her watch, Anya moaned, "Oh damn, I am going to be late for work and so is Xander. And Dawn will be late to school. Buffy, you want me to drop her off on my way to the shop so Xander might make it to work on time?"  
  
"Sure." Buffy said, "I'll go make sure that she is ready." With that, Buffy made a discreet exit and knocked on Dawn's door next, "Are you ready to go, Dawn?" She asked as she pushed the door open.  
  
Dawn had just finished putting Spike's duster under her bed when Buffy came in. Quickly, she put her hands on her made-up bed and smoothed it over. "Yeah," she said, covering very well, "I was just finishing making the bed. But I am ready to go now."  
  
"Ok. Come downstairs then and get something to eat. Anya is going to drive you to school today."  
  
Dawn's eyes lit up. "Cool." She said, coming out of her room to see Anya and Xander come out of Xander's bedroom. "Oh my god!" She gasped before the memories took over.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Coming out of her room to see Willow in the hall. Telling Willow it's 10:30. Talking about how messed up things are with Spike and Buffy and Anya and Xander. Seeing Tara walk out of the room, wrapped in a sheet. Jumping up and down, saying "I'm not here, I'll go downstairs and watch tv real loud so I can't hear anything that might be going on upstairs!" Happiness and joy.  
  
Arriving home to an empty house. Calling out for Buffy, going upstairs, noticing Willow's bedroom door open. Walking in and seeing Tara's body. Slumping in a corner, crying, shaking, not wanting to leave Tara there alone. How many hours spent there, trapped in a waking hell. Sobbing til the tears no longer come. Watching Tara's body grow cold, watching the blood congeal, feeling her escense depart. Feeling herself grow cold. Welcoming the coldness as it makes the pain numb. Embracing the cold fury. Anger at being left alone to find this, anger at being in Buffy's life where she had buried her mother, her sister, and now her friend.  
  
Buffy and Xander calling for Willow and Dawn, no answer. Buffy coming upstairs into Willow's room and finding Tara's body. "Oh god..." trailing off.  
  
"I didn't want to leave her alone" Dawn, huddling and shaking in the darkened corner in fear and shock, crying. Buffy telling her they have to go downstairs. Hugging Buffy. Xander walking in silently and staring at Tara's body for a moment, pain on his face.  
  
Sitting on the couch as the coroner takes Tara's body down the stairs in a body bag on a gurney. Xander signing some papers at the door as the coroner gives him some instructions as to where to call tomorrow for more answers. Xander walking into the living room, sitting with the two girls. Buffy saying they have to find Willow soon. Xander commenting that if Willow finds Warren, he's a dead man. "Good" Dawn chiming in coldly.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"God damnit!" Dawn screamed, before collapsing in a heap on the floor, sobbing as if her heart was breaking.  
  
Sharing concerned looks; Anya, Buffy, and Xander all knelt beside the younger Summers. Buffy was the first one to speak, "Dawn, baby?" She tried tentatively.  
  
When Dawn only screamed louder, Anya took a stab at it, "Dawnie," she winced as she used Willow's pet nickname for Dawn, "Dawn, it's ok. Tell us what is wrong. Are you hurt?" Meeting even less success than Buffy, Anya turned helpless eyes to Xander.  
  
Xander looked at the fetal postioned Dawn and very gently picked her up. Caring Dawn, he laid her on her bed and sat down next to her, rubbing her hair, "Come on Dawn, it is ok, I promise. Me and Anya are trying to work things out between us, it's ok, baby."  
  
The words finally penetrated the pain in Dawn's heart and she raised up, hissing, "No, it's not ok." She started talking faster and faster, "I mean this is how Willow and Tara were. And I come home to find Tara dead. Dead, god damnit! Dead like she never exhisted in the first fucking place! That is how either you or Anya will end up. Damnit, I have lost my mother, my sister, Tara, Willow and Spike. I can't fucking lose one of you two as well and that is exactly what will happen in this fucked up place we call Sunnydale!"  
  
"No Dawn." Xander said gently, "This is not like Willow and Tara, don't even think that. Neither me or Anya would ever leave you..."  
  
"That's what Spike said." Dawn cut him off rudely.  
  
Xander's hands tightened imperceptably at the mention of Spike's name, "He did, did he?" He shot Buffy a look, "Honey, I am not like Spike, do you believe that?" She nodded, "Then I am not going to leave you. And neither will Anya. I swear to you, nothing is going to happen to us."  
  
Slowly calming down, the tears dried on her face as she thought about it, "But you really can't promise me that someone won't kill you too, can you?" She sounded completly lost when she said that, so heartbroken, that all three of them felt the tears welling to the surface. Pulling her close to him, Xander nodded to Buffy and Anya who joined them on the bed, hugging Dawn close to their hearts. 


	9. A Moment in Time

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemnly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no, I have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible  
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please. The poem in this belongs to my ex and it's called "Bonds" (no copy write infringement is intended with the use of that poem). The second poem is mine and it is called "Leaving"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"What did I miss?" Oz asked quietly from the doorway to Dawn's room. He had been downstairs but heard Dawn screaming and came to see what the matter was.  
  
Anya gently extracted herself from the group hug on the bed and walked over to Oz. Whispering, she said, "Dawn saw me come out of Xander's room this morning. I thought that she would be happy that Xander and me are going to give this another shot. But then she started screaming and swearing at us before she just collapsed on the floor. I think she thinks that one of us will die if we do get back together. It's what happened when Tara died, her and Willow had just gotten back together, and Dawn is the one that found Tara's body.."  
  
Oz's eyes went wide with sympathy for the younger Summers, "She found Tara's body?"  
  
"Yes." Anya said, her own eyes filling with tears, "She found Tara and stayed with her until Buffy and Xander got home a couple of hours later. Apparently, it was pretty traumatic for her. I don't think she dealt with it, just locked it inside herself."  
  
"Man, that's rough.." Oz stated, "But you guys are all going to be late for work and Dawn doesn't need to go to school today. I can watch her while you all are gone."  
  
Anya nodded and caught Buffy's attention. Buffy got off the bed and joined them in the doorway, "Oz has offered to watch Dawn. He doesn't think she needs to go to school today and, frankly, neither do I. She should stay at home and get some sleep and stuff."  
  
Reluctantly, Buffy nodded, "I hate to have her miss a day the first week of school but she needs to be at home. I wish I could stay here but I can't. I have to go to work or we won't make the bills this month." She sighed and said, "I don't know how responsive she will be to you, Oz. Just remember that she has been through a lot lately and..." Buffy trailed off, realizing how inadequate that sounded. Gently, she gripped Oz's hand and said quietly, "Thank you, Oz."  
  
A little bit later on, Dawn was sleeping in her bed and the others were leaving for work. Xander paused on his way out the door and looked at Oz, "Take care of her, man. Mine and Buffy's work number are on the fridge. Call if you need anything."  
  
"Will do." Oz, as usual, was using phrases instead of sentences, "I will take care of Dawn."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Oz sat on the couch, flipping from MTV to VH-1 and back again. "Do neither one of these damn music channels play, oh I don't know, music." He muttered angrily before dropping the remote in disgust.  
  
"No they don't." Dawn said as she entered the room, "All they play are those stupid reality shows that aren't very realistic. I mean, nobody ever dies," her voice cracked as she said the word but she ignored it and pressed on, "on those silly shows. It's why I hate Survivor as well. I mean, it's totally retarded to believe that these people are really in danger."  
  
"They are in danger." Oz said. When she looked at him with a very skeptical gaze, he shrugged and explained, "They are in danger of making themselves look like morons on national television. Some would consider that a fate worse than death, you know."  
  
Dawn looked at him as if he had grown an extra head right before her eyes. Just when he was really starting to wonder, she cracked up laughing. Relieved, he smirked slightly, "Here, you can have the remote. I'm gonna get something to eat, you want something?"  
  
Catching the remote that he tossed her, she turned it on to Passions, Spike's favorite soap opera without really noticing that she had done so. "Turkey sammich would be nice." She said, losing herself in the television.  
  
"Sure." Oz said and walked into the kitchen. Soon he came out, bearing two sandwiches and two cokes, "Here you go." Joining her on the couch, they ate in companionable silence until Oz noticed what she was watching, "You complain about Survivor and yet you watch soap operas?"  
  
Dawn flushed a little under the gently derision, "Yeah, well," she said defensively, "I used to watch it all the time with Spike. It's his fault that I like this stupid show."  
  
Understanding flashed across his eyes, gone in an instant. Reaching over, he gently touched her shoulder, "It's ok to miss Spike."  
  
"Buffy and Xander don't think so." Dawn said bitterly.  
  
Oz sighed and gathered his thoughts, "They each had a different relationship with Spike than the one that you had with him. Buffy and Xander do miss Spike, though they will never ever tell you that. It's just that, for Buffy, she was very hurt when he slept with Anya and then left Sunnydale without saying a word, especially after he promised not to. Xander misses Spike because of what he did for Buffy, even though Xander did not know it was going on at the time. The both of them are mad at Spike and you are hurt. You miss Spike because the two of you are friends and he hurt you when he left. Too much to make you angry, it just makes you sad." He paused to see if she was absorbing all of what he was saying, "I miss Willow. I miss her for a million reasons that I won't get into with you but the main one is because for ever she is my best friend."  
  
Dawn was trembling at his words and she said, "Spike is my best friend too. He and I could sit for hours, doing nothing. We didn't need to talk to one another. I, um, wrote a poem about it. Would you like to read it?" She asked hesitantly. When he nodded, she ran upstairs to get the poem. Coming down, she handed it to him...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Few and Far between,  
There are people that I meet.  
Who are different then most.  
Something unspoken lingers in the air.  
  
Minutes of silence, seems like hours together.  
Hours like months, an eternity spent with them.  
All of this, just in the moments of silence.  
A bond of friendship, undefined by words.  
  
Depths of unknown trust, formed on a whim.  
Yet, looking back now... I can still count the ones,  
On the fingers of just one hand.  
I can still recall their faces, ever etched in my mind.  
  
Although the knife wounds still seem fresh.  
The sharp piercing pain, above the kidney, near the spine.  
Fear, Hatred, Shame, Loss, all mixed with tears and mud.  
Things said that echo through each night, forever in regret.  
  
Alone at night, cold and dark.  
Thinking if I just had their number,  
Uncertain of what to say, cherishing the times,  
When nothing had to be said.  
  
Unable to forget the moment of breaking.  
Things that should of never been said.  
Having to forgive, the true test of the bond.  
Forever in my thoughts, you'll be forgiven.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Finding his voice after reading it, Oz said "This is gorgeous. Can I make this into a song?"  
  
"Really?" Dawn asked, excitement lighting her face, "I mean, you really like it and stuff? And you want to make a song out of it? That is like so cool!"  
  
Oz reread it silently, "Yeah, I mean there is something in here for everyone and I really love the way that you ended it. Do you have any more?"   
  
Dawn ran upstairs and got her other poem that she never showed anyone. Coming downstairs, she handed it to Oz and waited for him to read it.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Today everything fell apart  
Slipped through my fingers to shatter  
on the floor. I lay here crying.  
I lay here dying.  
  
Please don't look at me now, not like this.  
with hate in your eyes and all the lies  
shining brightly, sealed with a kiss.  
Get out of my head, out of my heart.  
  
Leave me standing here in the rain  
I don't want to live without you.  
You don't want to feel this pain.  
You don't want to care.  
  
So you left me, under an empty sky.  
Now get the hell out of my heart.  
I tried so hard to be what you wanted me to be.  
But you left without even saying goodbye.  
  
I guess I can get through this.  
I guess that I can face it alone.  
Not what I would have chosen  
with a heart now frozen.  
  
Forever, I will live with this hole  
that you used to fill.  
The memories I cannot shake  
for the love I cannot hate.  
  
Leave me standing here in the rain  
I don't want to live without you.  
You don't want to feel this pain  
You don't want to care.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Oz finished reading it, tears in his own eyes, and asked, "Can I hire you as my lyricist?" 


	10. The Ones We Love

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" or "Angel", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, WB, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemnly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no, I have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible  
  
Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Buffy came home on her lunch hour to see Oz playing on his guitar and singing one of his songs to a starry eyed Dawn. She paused in the doorway and watched the two of them, smiling and laughing at each other, and thanked the powers that be that Oz had come home. It seemed that Oz was helping Dawn to break out of the shell that neither she nor Xander had been able to crack, no matter how hard they tried.  
  
As if her thoughts had summoned Xander, he and Anya walked in the door just as Oz was starting to play with the melody for the "Leaving" lyrics that Dawn had given him. The three of them basically froze in the doorway as Dawn hesitantly began to sing the verses, with Oz providing the counterpart to the melody. When the two of them finished the song, the room stilled for a minute before Xander, Buffy and Anya broke the silence with applause.  
  
Dawn snapped her head up and flushed bright red, "Buffy, Xander, Anya...what are you doing home?"  
  
"I came home to check on you." Buffy said, "Dawn, that was wonderful, keep singing for us."  
  
Xander and Anya chimed in with their own praise as Dawn blushed brighter and brighter. Taking pity on her crimson cheeks at last, Oz pulled Buffy with him into the kitchen. "She wrote that song, Buffy. And it is about Spike" He told her as she was making herself a salad to eat.  
  
She paused for a moment, hanging her head over the table, "I know." She fiddled with her hair for a second, "Dawn misses him enough for the both of us. I could kill him for leaving her like this but what would that solve other than to make her hate me?"  
  
The tragedy and the irony of the situation struck Oz like a lightening bolt, "Buffy, what will you do if you do have to kill him?"  
  
Buffy looked at him with haunted eyes, looking much the same as when she decided to end the fighting between her and Angelus. "I will kill him." She closed her eyes as she said it, feeling the pain from that statement even though she denied it for herself, preferring to pretend that the pain that she felt was for Dawn. "I won't want to do it. But I will if he makes me." *Please, gods, don't make me have to kill him too. I don't know that I will be strong enough to do that.*  
  
Oz placed a sympathetic hand on her arm, lacking the words to say anything else.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Willow came down the stairs, looking for Spike. She found him, lounging in a chair, watching Passions. "You still like watching that show, love?" She questioned as she curled up beside him.  
  
He pulled her closer to him and rubbed her arm, "Gods, I love it when you wear all leather, Red." He said, playing with her hair, "It's a stupid show but, it's amusing and stuff." He pulled her into his lap and caressed her back.  
  
Arching playfully under his hands, she posed for him. Now that she was a vampire, she found that she liked herself that much more. Enough to feel comfortable wearing skin tight clothing, anything that showed off her curves, but she especially loved the leather. It made her feel all that much more potent as a woman, something that the magic also gave her, but without the side effects. "I like leather." She said, playfully licking her red lips, "It makes me feel all bad inside."  
  
"I know, love." Spike chuckled slightly, lifting one eyebrow in a sardonic glance, "It makes me want to eat you. I can imagine that is quite the power trip for the witch."  
  
Willow purred as she caught his lower lip between her fangs, "You had better believe it." Pulling back from him slightly, she asked, pouting, "Is it time for us to play yet?"  
  
Spike shifted his weight to support her as she leaned back, "Not quite yet love, we still have a couple of hours before dark."  
  
"Good." Willow purred and slid back into his lap, "I hate waiting. Keep my mind occupied?"  
  
"Love to." Spike growled. "Do you want to play love?"  
  
Willow brightened considerably, no longer pouting, "What do you want to play?"  
  
In response, Spike lunged forward, capturing her wrists with his hands. Wide eyed, she allowed him to tug her forward against his lap, making no move to save herself even as he ravaged her mouth. Finally, she gathered her wits and pulled back, trying to escape his touch, knowing all the while that would drive him crazy. "Come on, love, you know that you want it." He growled and pulled her back into his lap. Putting both hands in one of his, he ran his free hand down her face, down her neck, onto her breast before squeezing once in warning.  
  
"Let go of me." She hissed and struggled to get away.  
  
Laughing, he swept her into his arms and stood up. "You don't want to get away love." He promised her before heading for the stairs. "A little girl like you, flaunting herself before me, squirming all over my lap, showing off that lovely neck of yours. You want me to do this to you." Climbing the stairs, he almost dropped her as she bit his arm. Eyes glowing hotly with desire, "You will pay for that, Red." He promised. Kicking in the door to their room, he dropped her on the bed, crushing her beneath his weight. "Come on now," he crooned, "Be a good girl."  
  
"Never." She hissed, eyes glowing with the power that she held over Spike, "I will never be a good girl."  
  
With one hand pinning both of her hands to the bed, Spike loosened the ties to her shirt with his other hand. Lowering his head, he licked, suckeled, bit, and nuzzled until Willow was gasping and squirming underneath him, trying to pull him closer to her. Still holding her down, he stripped of his clothes and took hers off as well before capturing both of her hands and rolling on his back, pulling her on top of him. "I think you are lying." He accused and slipped one hand between her legs, "Good girls would have screamed by now." He worked his fingers back and forth, "And good girls wouldn't get all wet when I did this to them." Flipping her over again, he pinned her arms to the bed and lowered his head down between her thighs, bringing her to the brink of orgasm, stopping her from it by biting down on her tender flesh.  
  
Screaming, she tried to pull him closer, to finish what he started, to ease the pain of the bite with the release of pleasure. Not wanting to beg for it, still her mouth fell open and shamelessly, "Spike, please don't stop."  
  
"Why should I not stop?" He asked, tracing the lips of her vagina with one finger, flicking the sensative flesh with his fingernail.  
  
Willow squirmed and bucked underneath him, "Because I want you." She gasped out. Sensing that he needed to hear more than that, she moaned, "Because I love you and I am your bad girl and I want you to fuck me hard. Please Spike, just fuck me."  
  
Accent thickening, Spike murmered, "Gods, I love it when you talk dirty. Do you want me to hurt you?" He asked. When she nodded, he vamped out and entered her, biting down with his fangs and his fingers on her tender flesh, bringing both of them to a screaming orgasm within moments.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Buffy?" The voice on the other end of the phone was Angel.  
  
Gasping in surprise, Buffy exclaimed "Angel?" She had just walked in from work to hear the phone ringing and picked it up. "How are you?" She asked, trying to still the surge of love for Angel that she still felt so deeply all other men paled in comparison.   
  
Angel smiled into the phone, relieved to hear her voice and loving her still, "Buffy, you are in trouble." He warned, "Cordy had a vision last night. It was not clear enough for her to make it out well but she said that you are going to have some terrible choices before you that you will have to face. She almost threw me in the car to get to you."  
  
"Oh?" Buffy asked, Slayer senses on full alert.  
  
"Yeah." Angel said, "I am going to come down there tonight." He hesitated for a moment, almost as if he could sense that she was going to tell him no. "Don't argue with me about this one, Buffy. I have to be there. Something in Cordy's dream was insistent on it."  
  
Buffy slowly sank to the floor, mind racing, "Ok." She said and continued before she could catch herself, "I love you." The tears welled up as she said it, feelings she had buried for so long rising to the surface, "I'm sorry." She rushed to apologize, "It's still a habit with me."  
  
"It's ok." Angel said softly, wondering at Buffy, at the raw honesty in her voice. How could she still love him for so long, with so much between them? He loved her still but he was amazed at her capacity to love him, to forgive his sins, even as he wondered at himself for still loving her. "I will be there later on tonight. And Buffy," He paused for a second before closing his eyes, admitting what he had buried for too long as well, "I love you too." 


	11. Willow and Spike

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" or "Angel", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, WB, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemnly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no, I have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please. Hummm I actually am a huge B/S Shipper but I swear this story has a mind of it's own, just from me playing with the idea of the evil Willow. Of course, once I gave Willow Spike and reunited Anya and Xander, that left Buffy with either Riley (over my dead body) or Angel. Mmmmmm wondering about others tho...maybe I'll play with this some more ;-)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Spike went out after dark. He went alone, fairly unusual for him not to be with Willow, but she was looking for a place for them to move to. They were probably going to end up in another warehouse, but neither he nor she was picky, they just wanted a lair that the Slayer didn't know about. Walking quickly and silently through the cemetary, he opened the door to his crypt and scowled at the mess that Clem had made. Glancing around quickly, he noted that Clem was out, "Wanker is either at a poker game or he's busting the geeks out of jail." Spike muttered angrily to himself, "I told him to stay away from those three but he didn't listen to me. Just hope, for his sake, that the Slayer never found out about his involvement with them, she'd of killed us both." Angrily, Spike kicked at the Country Time Lemonade container on the floor, spraying the powder all over the room. He still regretted...but never mind about that, that momentary weakness that he used to have for the Slayer. His witch had fixed him, his witch loved him, his   
witch would never ever leave him. Closing his eyes for a second, he lit up a cigarette and lost himself in the memories...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Shaking, gods above and beyond, he was tired. He staggered out of the cave, exhausted, triumphant, and evil once again. Seeing the man who tried to warn him off going into the cave, he grabbed the human and lowered his fangs to the man's neck. Just as his teeth pierced the man's skin, a piercing agony, so familiar and so hated, split his skull open. Screaming, he dropped the human and rounded on the demon that had followed him from the cave, "I thought you were going to remove the bloody chip, you stupid wanker." Spike yelled, holding his hands to his head, "What the fuck? Did you fuck up or something?"  
  
"That was not what you wished for, Spike." The demon said, unperturbed, "You wished that you could be like you were before the Slayer. The love you bore for her has been removed. The chip in your head had nothing to do with that." Spike stared at the demon, feeling his world rock underneath him. Seeing red, he vamped out and lunged at the demon, only to be stopped by some sort of shield around the demon. "You have gotten your wish, William the Bloody. You shall get no more." The demon said and vanished. Spike stared at the spot where the demon had stood for a long moment. Leaning his head back, the sound tore itself out of his throat, a howl so wild and crazed it scared the villagers half a mile away.  
  
Willow heard the sound of that yell from the cruising altitude of a 747, as the agony was enough to rip across several planes of the world. Wincing at the pain it caused, she traced the emotional residue down to Africa, to the small village where Spike was kneeling in the dirt. Pausing for a moment, she gathered the energy that Spike was using to project his pain and quickly spun it into a spell before the emotional reidue faded out. Between one moment and the next, she diappeared from her seat in the airplane and   
reappeared on the ground beside him. "You look like you could use some help, Spike." She said casually, dropping down on her haunches beside him.  
  
Spike was bloody startled to see Willow appear out of thin air like that and masked it with a snarl, "If you want to help me, put a bloody stake in me."  
  
Willow cocked her head to one side and asked playfully, "Now where would be the fun in that?" She ran her hand down the side of his face, stopping with her fingers on his lips, "You are such a potent source of energy for me," she purred. "All angry and upset. What's the matter, Spike? Did you find out that the puppy is still fixed from the trip to the vet?"   
  
Looking at her with unmasked hate in his eyes, Spike growled, "If you just came here to taunt me, Red, go away. Or better yet, send Xander in. Preferably with an axe. Let him finish what I know he wants to do, the bloody wanker."  
  
"Tsk, and here we thought you liked Xander." Willow shook her finger admonishingly at Spike.  
  
"Oh please." Spike said sardonically. "I'd like to put my fist through his face. Then I'd like to eat him."  
  
She reached over and cracked him with her palm across his face, "Be nice, Spike." She warned him. "Xander is not the one that you want to hurt. Tell me who it is that you want to hurt the most, Spike." Closing her eyes, she put one hand to his head, "And don't bother lying, I can always tell when you lie."  
  
Spike felt the heat from Willow's slap on his face. The demon howled and twisted inside him, desperatly wanting to get out but he knew he couldn't attack Willow. "You will pay for that." He threatened. Willow just laughed at his empty threat and cocked her head to one side, waiting for the answer to her question. Spike sighed and hissed, "I want to kill the Slayer." He exploded verbally since he couldn't touch her physically, "I want to rip her still beating heart out of her chest and eat it for dinner! There, are you happy now?"  
  
"So you don't love her anymore?" Willow asked, again running her fingers down the side of his face, tracing the handprint that she had left.  
  
Spike shuddered at the thought, wondering if the witch would actually kill him for the answer that he was going to give her. "No."  
  
A long moment passed between the two of them. Just as Spike was really beginning to think Willow was going to stake him after all, she smiled, a slow sexy smile, at him and said, "Good, Spike. That is what I wanted to hear you say." She knocked him back with her witch power and straddled him, holding his hands down with magic and her hands. Leaning over him so that her hair tickled his face, she was inches away from his ear when she whispered, "I can help you, Spike, but there is something that you have to do for me." Teasing him, she ran her tongue down the outside of his ear, down to the bite marks that Drucilla had left when she turned him. "I can get that chip out of your head." Willow said, rubbing her body up and down his, getting his full, complete, and undivided attention.  
  
"What do I have to do?" He asked, anger warring with arousal.  
  
Willow stared at him for half a second before pulling his head into her neck, "Turn me."  
  
He looked at her, a panicked expression on his face, "You know that I can't."  
  
"I will hold the chip immobile when you bite me, when you drain me." Willow promised him, "Turn me and the chip will go away for good and you will be your normal self again." He looked at her, saw the promise in her eyes, closed his own eyes and sank his teeth into her flesh. Hot human blood, gods how he missed the taste of that, splashed over his tongue. Greedily he drank, expecting to feel the pain from the chip at any second. When no pain came, he drank deeper and deeper, almost to deep before he ripped himself away from her. Opening the vein on his wrist, he held it to Willow's mouth, made her drink, made her his child.  
  
She woke way sooner than he would have expected her to. He could feel her hunger pains through the bond they now shared and he found a human for her to drain. He watched her enviously as she drained the human, as she sucked him dry, as she lapped at the hot blood on her tongue. Looking up from her meal, Willow purred, "He tastes so good, Spike. Come and have a taste." Willingly, he sank to her side. She dragged him down into a kiss, letting him lap the blood out of her mouth before seperating and getting more blood to feed him with.   
  
When they had drained the human, Spike fisted his hands in Willow's hair and yanked her head back, "Now, Red, you want to uphold your part of the bargain?"  
  
Willow smiled at Spike and called on her magic, allowing her eyes to pool black, "It's done, Spike. You are free of the chip."  
  
Spike vamped out and let Willow go. Smelling the humans in the air, he growled and ran after one of them. Reaching the woman's side, he ripped her off her feet and sank his fangs into her neck, sucking as hard as he could. The chip was gone, he was evil again, and he had a new child, one that looked to be as into him as he could loose himself in her. Things were definatly looking up.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Spike smiled as he recalled that memory and crushed out his cigarette. Looking at the bed that he and Buffy had spent countless hours in, Spike smiled and said, "I told you things were going to change, bitch. Only thing is, this time I have the witch on my side and I hate you more that I ever hated you before. Get ready, Slayer. Your worst nightmare is about to come true, starting with the little bit." 


	12. Opening Moves

Disclaimers: Joss is god and I am not. I have nothing to do with the series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" or "Angel", nor am I in any way affiliated with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, WB, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just a fan content to borrow (if I owned, I would be rich and ride horses for entertainment) for a while but I do solemnly swear to put all the toys back in the box when I am done with them.  
  
Spoilers: Anything season 6 on back except for the last two episodes this season that I am steadily avoiding the spoilers for...and no, I have avoided as much of whatever the next one is (Dark Willow?) as possible Timeline - right around the season 7 opener...after the summer  
  
Author's Notes: First fan fic so be nice and R&R. If you want to post it somewhere, get permission please. Hummm I actually am a huge B/S Shipper but I swear this story has a mind of it's own, just from me playing with the idea of the evil Willow. Of course, once I gave Willow Spike and reunited Anya and Xander, that left Buffy with either Riley (over my dead body) or Angel. Mmmmmm wondering about others tho...maybe I'll play with this some more ;-)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Night fell and with it came Angel and Conner. Angel was apprehensive about what Buffy would say when she saw Conner, he had told her about his son but he wasn't sure if she was really ready to meet him yet. He walked up the porch stairs and knocked on the door, telling himself not to fidget or stammer. The wait seemed to last an eternity before she opened the door, golden in the lamp light. "Buffy..." Was all Angel could choke out, seeing her always brought him to his knees.  
  
"Angel." Buffy said and threw her arms around her long time lover. "Gods, I have missed you so much." The two of them stood there, hugging and trembling, until Conner cleared his throat, a poignant reminder that he was still on the porch with them. Buffy stepped back from Angel, a blush rising on her cheeks, "And you must be Conner." She stated and pulled him into a hug as well, "I am so glad that I finally get to meet you." Leading them into the living room, she announced, "Look who's here, everyone."  
  
The rest of the group greeted the newcomers and sat down for a quick catch up before moving on to more serious issues.  
  
"So like I said, Cordy had a vision that something bad was going to happen but was kind of hazy on the details, just that I needed to be here." Angel said, "She saw more than that but I couldn't get her to tell me exactly what she saw, other than we all face a crossroads. Something either really bad or really good is supposed to happen and not even The Powers that Be can decipher which apparently."  
  
Xander smiled slightly and reached for Anya's hand, "Something really bad or really good. Yup, sounds completely normal for Sunnydale. You two," he shot both Angel and Buffy that look, "Make sure you don't get around to having perfect happiness. Not that I don't love you but I so don't want to repeat another apocalypse thing."  
  
"We won't, Xander." Angel stated. "Personally, I have no desire to become Angelus again. I don't like him and I don't think he likes me either. Scratch that, I know for a fact that he hates my guts." The others stared at Angel for a long moment, it seemed that the broody man had actually developed a sense of humor, something most of them found exceedingly hard to fathom. Finally, Buffy started to laugh and was joined in by the others.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Something has changed." Willow said, coming awake with a start.  
  
Spike rolled over to cuddle Willow by his side, "What do you mean love?"  
  
"I wish that I could tell you. This has suddenly become a lot more important than simple revenge. It seems," Willow paused to stare meaningfully at Spike, "That The Powers That Be are taking a vested interest in the Slayer again. So much so that the universe shall be rebalanced in the end." She sighed and let her eyes unfocus, "More than that is shadowed and I can't see past the shadows. But one thing is certain, the final battle between good and evil is coming."  
  
"The final conflict, eh?" Spike asked, "Well that is either going to be really bad for the Slayer or really bad for us and it's time for the bad guys to win for a change." He got out of bed, lighting a cigarette and moving to stand by the window of their new home. "So what do you say, shall we go find the little bit."  
  
Willow dragged herself out of bed and put her head in her hands, seeing more visions, "Dawn is no longer the weakest link in the mix." She said as she dragged her hands through her hair, "She is not the one that we need to pursue. Conner, on the other hand, is weak and he is Angel's son. Killing him will drive them all crazy and will maybe bring Angelus out to play again." Spike growled as Willow mentioned Angelus, he had already lost two girls to that bastard, he wasn't about to lose another one. Willow looked at him, smiling, "You won't lose me to Angelus, Spike. I love only you. I promise you that."  
  
"Then let's go get Conner." Spike said.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Against all orders and his own common sense, Conner was outside of the Summer's house, breathing in the night air, getting away from all the people in the house, if only for a little while. He was thinking about Buffy, whom he knew was the love of Angel's life even more so than his love for Darla, and about Dawn. Something about Dawn was utterly compelling to him. Maybe it was that "I need protection" aura that she projected but, in any case, he could not help thinking about how pretty she was and how much she made him feel comfortable to be around her. He wasn't all that comfortable with females his own age as of yet but he could get to like it if Dawn was the one he had to learn on. While thinking about Dawn, he started to wander around the house, not really paying attention to where his feet were taking him. Finally, he snapped out of his reverie, glancing around to see a part of Sunnydale that he had never seen before. Quelling the rising panic, he turned to retrace his steps, only to realize that he had no memory of how he came to be here, or how he was going to get back.  
  
Willow smiled as she watched though her scrying crystal the spell that she was using to take over Conner's feet take effect. Finally, she put down the crystal and nodded to Spike, both of them stepping out of the shadows of the alleyway into the street that Conner was standing on. "You look lost, sweetheart." Willow purred as she advanced closer, "Can we help you find your way?"  
  
Conner went instantly on alert as the two stepped out of the alley. The woman was mesmerizing to look at, red hair, beautiful expressive eyes, tight body encased in skin tight leather, and he was having a hard time maintaining his alertness around her, lust roaring in his ears. "No thanks." He managed to strangle out, "I can find my own way."  
  
"Now that's not very civil of you." Spike said menacingly, "Here is my pet offering to help you find your way and you tell us to bugger off. For all you know, we could be guardian angels or some such rot and yet you still shun us." Turning his head to one side, he remarked to Willow, "I like this one, he either has courage or he is too stupid to be afraid."  
  
"But I like it when they are afraid," Willow said, pouting, "It's like meat tenderizer for humans."  
  
*It's like meat tenderizer for humans.* Willow's words pounded themselves into Conner's brain and he took off running as fast as he could down the street. *Just my luck, run into a couple of vampires that want to eat me. Dad is going to kill me.*  
  
Spike and Willow smiled at each other as they watched Conner run down the street, leaving a trail of fear a mile wide for them to track. Slowly, Spike started to walk after the fleeing figure before turning to look at Willow, "You know, love, I don't really feel like chasing him. Would you just magic him here, please?" Willow's eyes turned black as she cast the spell and Spike caught Conner as she dropped the power and Conner to the ground. She also put him to sleep on his way back to them so that he would not fight her spell. Hefting Conner over his shoulder, Spike nodded to Willow and said, "And that is why I love you. Good work, pet."  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"What do you mean, Conner is gone?" Buffy asked Dawn, voice rising slightly in agitation.  
  
Dawn gave her sister the "shush, we don't want Angel to notice" look and said, "Exactly what I said. He told me that he wanted to go outside for some fresh air and to be alone for a minute. To, you know, regroup and stuff. I told him to stay on the porch but when I went out there to check on him, he was gone without a trace."  
  
Angel came into the room, worry already apparent on his face. He announced, "Conner is gone."  
  
The two Summer's women looked at him with "duh" expressions and Buffy asked, "How did you know that?"  
  
"I can sense it. How did you two find out?" Angel sighed and closed his eyes, "Never mind, dumb question." He closed his eyes, the better to focus on the bond between him and his son, tracing it to Conner's location, "Ok, he isn't dead but he is asleep or unconscious. Until he wakes up, I can't track him with the bond. Guess we have to look for him the old fashioned way."  
  
Buffy stared at Angel, so much that she had no clue of when it came to him but she was still surprised with what he told her, "Right. I'm on it. Let me get the gang and some weapons and we will go hunting." 


	13. Let the Games Begin

"Let's go." Willow said as she came down the stairs of the warehouse. "Spike, we need to go now. Get your stuff, leave the boy, but we have to go. Now."  
  
Spike looked up from Conner's cage and asked, "Go? What do you mean, pet? We have Conner and there is no way that Buffy and company could possibly know where we are. We are safe, love."  
  
"No you're not." Conner said, having been feigning sleep for a while now, "My father is on the way and he is going to kill you, Spike, and your little skank girlfriend there." He knew Spike on sight and could only guess who the redhead was.  
  
Casually, Willow walked over to the cage, using her magic to pull Conner's face to her, "Don't call me a skank." She ordered before slapping him hard enough to draw tears. Again, her eyes went black with the power of the spell that she was channeling and she looked at Conner, crouching in the corner, staring at her with hate filled eyes. "The boy is right, Spike. They are on there way. I was wrong, Conner is the weakest link in the chain but he is also the most protected. The boy has a link to Angel, akin to the one that you and I share, but it is so much deeper than that. Angel is tracking Conner through the bond."  
  
"You can't block the bond?" Spike asked, more of a statement than a question, "Of course not, it's too deep for you to touch. Right then." Gathering up some stuff, he took one look around and muttered, "Good thing I wasn't really attached to this place." and followed Willow out into the night.   
  
Willow paused outside of the warehouse and cast something. Spike shot her a questioning look and she flashed him a quick smile, the black draining from her eyes. "Just a little spell to keep them busy while you and I go after our goal."  
  
Mystified, still Spike grinned at his Willow, "Anything you say, pet. You run this show and I'll try to keep up."  
  
"You'll do better than that." She tossed a sexy grin in his direction, "You always do."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Someone is casting spells." Anya said as they neared the warehouse. "I can't tell you who it is, they are cloaking their identity but there is definatly magic being performed."  
  
Buffy looked at Anya and said, "Right." The group gathered around Buffy, all were present except for Dawn whom, against her protests, had been left at home. "Anya and I will go through the front door, Xander and Oz the back, and Angel, you take the skyline. Everyone move." As soon as the group was in place, Buffy nodded to Anya, wishing briefly that Willow was there to help coordinate the attack, and kicked down the door. Immediatly, the two girls were set upon by three vampires even as Xander and Oz kicked down the back door. Anya and Buffy were fighting back to back while Xander and Oz fought their way over to the two girls. Angel came crashing in through the skyline and the group quickly dusted any remaining vampires.  
  
Looking around the room, Angel quickly picked up the trace of the bond and set off, intent on rescuing his son. Kicking down a door, Angel stopped in the doorway, staring into the room. The others crowded around him, also staring in silent disbelief at the room. "Conner." Angel cried, seeing his son in a cage and made to step into the room.  
  
Grabbing his arm, Anya hauled him back from the doorway, and hissed, "Don't." Angel nodded, frustrated, as they all stared helplessly at the room. The room had been transformed into a giant maze of hedges, one that looked like it could take years to traverse and the image of Conner in the cage was also magically illuminated so as to be seen from the great distance the entire group knew that they would have to cross to get to him. "This is not a spell." Anya stated, frowning at the room. "Someone has actually opened a portal to another world and this is what their world looks like. Or at least part of it."  
  
"So what do we need to do?" Buffy asked, sharing a quick look with Angel, worry apparent on both of their faces.  
  
"Save-K'nor." Oz blurted out. When the others shot him quizzical looks, he shrugged and said, "Hey I spent a lot of time in libraries. This is the world of the god Save-K'nor, the god of puzzles, conundrums and mazes. See," he pointed to the floor. On the cobblestones, there was a design of an unlit latern surround by a hexagon, "That is his symbol. Somehow, we have entered his realm and we have to complete the maze to get to Conner."  
  
*That would have to be one powerful spell.* Was the thought that flashed across everyone's mind. "Shit." Angel breathed, looking over the mass of hedges, "Well we can't walk on top of the walls." Reaching over he tried to shove his way through the hedges, only to be shoved back hard by some force, "And we can't get through them either."  
  
"Dawn!." Buffy exclaimed. At the blank looks that everyone gave her, she swore "Damnit, we left her at home. One of us needs to go back and protect her."  
  
Oz stepped up and looked at them, "She won't thank you for a babysitter, Buffy."  
  
"I know," Buffy said, looking down at the floor, "but I can't just leave her all alone in the house for hours, wondering what happened to all of us. Besides, whoever it is that set this up probably knows that we are all here and they are counting on this maze to keep us occupied. They are counting on us not being at the house."  
  
Anya started for the door, "I will go." She was almost at the doorway when it slammed shut in front of her, the force of the slam making her stagger. In the dead silence that followed, all of them heard the bolt being slammed shut. Running to the door, Anya ran into a force field of some kind, one that she could not break through and neither could anyone else. As the field began to close in on all of them, they were forced to enter the maze. "Well, I guess we don't have a choice now." Anya said as she backed up, away from the field.  
  
Buffy kicked at the field, suceeding in nothing other than bruising her foot. "Gods," she swore before giving it up, "Come on guys, the sooner we start, the sooner we can get to the house. I hope."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"So where exactly did you send them, pet?" Spike asked as he picked up his staggering Willow, the spell she cast took a lot out of her.  
  
Willow curled up against Spike's chest and said, "I opened a portal to another god's world and I sent Conner there. With any luck, they will be there for a while but time in that portal lasts longer there than it does here."  
  
Spike could feel his love shaking in his arms, "We need for you to get some food in you, pet. That spell took most of your energy and I can feel you tremble." Setting her down on a bench, he stalked down a quiet alley, sensing the presense of food. He was in luck, a teenage couple were making out right down the alley. Noting how close they were to the Bronze, Spike smirked and swooped in for the kill. Dragging his prey back to Willow, he watched her feed, watching the color return to her cheeks, the warmth return to her hands. The witch blood did that, as they both knew, and he liked the hot feeling of her skin, especially when he was... Throwing off that train of thought, Spike sent his mind down more constructive paths and tore his eyes off the erotic site of his mate feeding.   
  
Willow drank in the blood hungrily, musing to herself how much she had changed since she had gotten Spike to turn her. Once, she would have run screaming before sucking on blood, now it seemed like the most natural thing in the world to her, ,just like loving Spike was. Stealing a glance over at her lover, she half smiled. **Buffy was a damned fool for turning down what he offered her. Oh well, her loss and my gain.**  
  
Spike caught that half smile and asked, "And what do you find so funny, love?"  
  
"Oh," Willow said, licking the blood from her lips slowly, teasing Spike with the motion, "How stupid some people are. You know, you present them with a truth and they refuse to accept it. Then they throw it away and someone else," she lowered her lashes and looked at Spike slant eyed, "has sense enough to see what was discared. More the fool the person that lost the truth than the one that snapped it up as soon as they found it."  
  
"You wouldn't happen to be talking about a certain blond we have both had the misfortune to become acquainted with, are you now, pet?" Spike asked, amused at her, "Because you know, you stepping into my life like you did has been the greatest thing that ever happened to me. And I mean that, love."  
  
Willow finished draining the last human and smiled, feeling much restored, "I know, baby." Rising in one fluid motion, she held out her arm for Spike to take, "Now, I bet that there is a certain sister of a slayer that is home alone right now. And I just bet that we can get her to come out and play with us." Jauntily, the two of them started walking down the street, towards the Summer's house. 


End file.
